Why the Traditional 9-to-5 Career Isn’t Built for Highly Sensitive People (and the solution)
Up until my early 30s I had never heard of the term Highly Sensitive. I had spent most of my career wondering ‘what on earth was wrong with me?”, confused as to why I couldn’t keep up with people around me and why I spent every weekend recovering after a week of working the 9-5 grind.
I had learned to deflect the innocent question: 'what did you get up to on the weekend?’, ashamed by the fact that I had done nothing except stay at home, recuperate and try and brace myself for the week ahead.
Discovering I was a highly sensitive introvert was a revelation, and brought with it a great sense of relief that there was nothing wrong with me at all; I just didn’t operate in the same way as the other 70-80% of the population.
What is a highly sensitive person (HSP), exactly?
Highly sensitive people have a higher depth of processing relating to everything in their internal and environment, both consciously and unconsciously. This means that we’re more aware of subtleties that other people would simply not even notice.
While these sensitivities can make us prone to things like taking on board people’s emotions and moods that lead us to becoming overstimulated very quickly, we can also learn to work these skills to our advantage.
If you’re highly sensitive, you can probably relate to:
Being very aware of subtleties in your environment.
Having a rich, complex inner world and with a highly active imagination.
Feeling anxious and stressed when under time constraints.
Being affected by the moods of people around you.
Having heightened senses - you see things people wouldn't normally notice; you’re particularly sensitive to strong smells and certain fabrics on your skin can feel uncomfortable.
A strong aversion of violence of any kind - in movies or in real life.
Having an extraordinary appreciation for art and music.
Being contentious and always giving your best.
Feeling overwhelmed when you have to focus on multiple things at once.
Loud noises being incredibly jarring and being startled easily.
Needing the right environment to feel comfortable, at peace and doing your best work.
Experiencing performance anxiety where being under pressure makes you do much worse than you would otherwise.
Changes and transitions in your life feeling especially disruptive.
Dr Elaine Aron, psychologist and author of the book, The Highly Sensitive Person, uses the acronym DOES to help describe the key traits of highly sensitives:
D is for Depth of Processing.
Research has found that sensitive people use more parts of the brain associated with “deeper” processing of information. This makes us highly attuned to what is happening in both our inner and outer worlds - basically we notice everything! This makes us more attentive to patterns of thinking, synchronicities and noticing subtleties that other people would simply not be aware of.
This level of processing makes us highly intuitive and when we develop this superpower, it can be used to our unique advantage.
O is for Overstimulation.
Given that our brains are always actively processing the world around us, it’s no surprise that we get overstimulated very easily. Being at crowded parties (or any kind of party!); exposed to loud music; watching violent movies and shopping malls can all be sources of overstimulation for highly sensitives. Even being around people for long periods can be incredibly draining which can feel especially overwhelming if not managed properly and firm boundaries are in place.
This is why spaciousness in our day and plenty of solitude are not nice-to-haves, they’re essential for our sanity.
E is for Emotional reactivity and Empathy.
I’m sure you’ve experienced someone telling you that you’re ‘too sensitive’, or overly emotional and making this out to be a bad thing! Research has confirmed that sensitives have stronger emotional reactions to both positive and negative stimuli. This means that due to our highly empathic nature, we feel other people’s emotions and respond to our circumstances in our environment with higher emotional charge than other people normally would.
S is for Sensing the Subtle.
Have you ever walked into a meeting, or a party and immediately been able to read the energy of the room without anyone saying anything? This is actually one of our biggest superpowers: we’re incredibly perceptive and can easily pick up on non-verbal cues that would normally go unnoticed.
So, if you’ve ever felt burned out, overwhelmed, or completely misaligned in your career, you’re not alone.
Truth be told, of all the areas in my life as an HSP; career was the one that I struggled with the most.
For HSPs, the conventional workplace often feels like a daily battle against sensory overload and emotional exhaustion.
But what if the problem isn’t you? What if the problem is the system itself?
Early on in my career I job hopped a lot, hoping and praying that the next job would be a better fit and provide me with what I needed to thrive. Sadly, each one of my career moves left me incredibly burned out and completely disillusioned with the concept of ‘work’ altogether.
Given our unique personality traits, there are several reasons why we don’t thrive in traditional careers:
Rigid Schedules.
The rigid and restrictive nature of 9-5’s doesn’t allow for the downtime we need to show up as our best selves. The ability to be in control of our time so that we can account for energy fluctuations and create spaciousness in our days is vital for HSP’s.
Personally, I know that I work best when I have space in the morning to ease into the day and begin my work without feeling like I’m rushing.
Being able to craft our day in a way that aligns with our natural rhythms is game-changing and a lot more productive.
It’s counterintuitive to consider that working less can actually make you more productive, but when you’re given the space to work in ways that honor your energy, you’re able to produce at a much higher rate than if you’re constantly pushing against your true nature.
One-Size-Fits-All Roles.
As HSP’s, we crave meaning and purpose in our careers. Our depth of processing and high levels of empathy make us immensely creative beings that when nurtured properly, allow us to contribute far more than any standard job description.
Yet, traditional roles rarely allow room for personalization, creativity, or meaningful contribution; and staying in these types of roles ultimately leads to high levels of anxiety, burnout and overwhelming frustration.
High-Stimulation Environments.
Open offices, constant deadlines, and multitasking are breeding grounds for HSP burnout. Everything from the harsh fluorescent lighting, constant disruptions from colleagues and loud conversations make us especially susceptible to overstimulation.
Try explaining this to your boss and they would look at you quizzically, like you had just requested time off to visit another planet.
The lack of understanding from colleagues and employers makes it very difficult for people to comprehend just how destructive these environments are for our overall well being.
And so, our needs go unmet and we’re again left with no choice but to suck it up and carry on as best as we can.
More often than not, this vicious cycle leads to burnout; something I am all too familiar with.
How Traditional Careers Lead to Burnout for HSPs.
The Burnout Cycle
The repetitive nature of showing up to work each day leads to perpetual overstimulation for HSP's; which then leads to extreme fatigue and shows up as reduced productivity, chronic stress and ultimately, burnout.
The main reason I changed jobs so many times was due to burning out. It was like I had hit a wall that meant I couldn’t see a way of being able to continue in that job, and I knew something had to change. My own lack of awareness around my needs as an HSP, made me think changing jobs would solve the problem, but it never did.
To make matters worse, none of my friends or family understood the despair I felt; and my constant job hopping left me with the label of “flighty”. I had many unsuccessful attempts trying to explain to people that I simply didn’t fit into the 9-5 job mold and they would either laugh me off as being crazy, or worse, lazy.
What are the Signs of Burnout for HSP’s?
Experiencing frequent sensory overload as a result of environmental factors is where burnout begins for HSP’s. This is then further compounded by other factors like doing work that is misaligned with our values; not being able to control how and when we do our work; being micromanaged; or having a toxic workplace culture.
Often when faced with these challenges, HSPs are told to "toughen up," "be less sensitive," or "just get on with it."
Over time, this messaging makes us feel like we’re the problem. So we doubt ourselves; continue to keep pushing in circumstances and environments that are completely wrong for us.
This manifests into persistent headaches, irritability, stress, overwhelming fatigue which then leads to full blown burnout.
What HSPs Need to Thrive
In 2014, buoyed by enthusiasm with the prospect of leaving a particularly toxic job, I decided to take a leap of faith into the world of freelancing and self-employment.
Thanks to a spark of curiosity I had back in 2009, I launched a blog and began to write consistently on the internet, which led to becoming one of the early adopters of social media.
These skills enabled me to initially offer consulting services to businesses; I then began teaching to wider audiences through organisations like General Assembly; I offered coaching to people who wanted to launch their own business; taught myself website design and coding and then was able to offer that as a service; I created digital products and courses; I launched an eCommerce business; and in 2022, I even launched an Airbnb!
Whilst I have experimented a lot and my business has gone through multiple iterations over the years; the foundational digital skills I cultivated through my blog, combined with leveraging the skills from my corporate career, provided a springboard to further develop in areas that I was interested in and pursue different paths that piqued my interest.
I thrived on having the autonomy to design my days; the freedom to pursue multiple interests and dive deep into areas that I was passionate about. Above all, I loved making a difference in people’s lives and feeling like I was actually doing work that truly mattered in the world.
So what are the ingredients HSP’s need to thrive?
Reflecting on my own experiences, along with speaking with many other HSP’s about their work challenges and preferences; I realized there three fundamental elements that all HSP’s need to thrive in their career:
Flexibility and autonomy.
Having control over your time and deciding how, when, and where your work gets done is crucial. This flexibility allows you to work in ways that allow you to be more productive and provide you with a sustainable way of making an income.
Going from the rigidity of corporate life to self employment where you have the freedom to design your schedule based on your energy rhythms is life-changing.
Purpose, meaning and alignment.
Living in alignment with your values; being able to express your creativity and having a positive impact, is key for HSPs.
Many traditional jobs prioritize profit or efficiency over meaning and purpose. For HSPs, this lack of alignment with personal values makes work feel hollow and unfulfilling.
While many people are content to stick it out in a job and career that doesn’t light them up from the inside-out - HSP’s do not fall into this category.
Mental activation.
HSPs thrive on being exposed to new ideas; different places and are avid learners.
We want to be challenged in our careers and put our empathy and depth of processing to good use, instead of being stuck in an unrewarding and monotonous roles that doesn’t serve our unique needs.
According to Dr Barrie Yeager, it is not unusual for HSPs to be multi-talented and have various skills they can apply to their career paths; or even for them to change careers numerous times throughout their life.
What’s important is finding a balance between routine and variety so you can remain engaged over the long term.
Reimagining work for HSP’s
If you’ve been struggling to thrive in a traditional career, know this: It’s not you—it’s the system.
You don’t have to change who you are to succeed. Instead, you can create a career that works for you on your own terms.
Whether you want to pursue self-employment so you can design a flexible, purpose-driven role that you design yourself; or you want to craft a portfolio style career that allows you to blend multiple income streams and provides mental stimulation while avoiding burnout - this is all possible thanks to the internet and the changing nature of work.
Understanding how to leverage your sensitive gifts and design a career that honors your true nature while aligning with your values is everything that I’ll be unpacking and sharing here and over the coming months.
